


How To Tell A Friend Someone Loved Them

by 4Jean_Drake7



Series: The Crank Palace [3]
Category: The Maze Runner Series - All Media Types, The Maze Runner Series - James Dashner
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Bisexual Thomas (Maze Runner), Depressed Newt, Depressed Thomas, Gay Newt (Maze Runner), Heavy Angst, Idiots in Love, M/M, Minho Ships It, The Author Regrets Nothing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-07
Updated: 2021-02-07
Packaged: 2021-03-12 06:48:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29256219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/4Jean_Drake7/pseuds/4Jean_Drake7
Summary: Disclaimer: Please read How To Start A New Life, How To Love Your Best Friend, and The Crank Palace before reading this.Minho doesn't know the truth about Newt's demise.It's up to Thomas to tell him, but how will Minho take it?More importantly, how will Thomas take it?
Relationships: Minho & Newt (Maze Runner), Minho & Thomas (Maze Runner), Newt/Thomas (Maze Runner)
Series: The Crank Palace [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2092518
Comments: 12
Kudos: 22





	How To Tell A Friend Someone Loved Them

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so I got a lot of inspiration from my own head to write this chapter. I really enjoyed writing it, so I hope you enjoy reading it! This is probably my favorite part of the The Crank Palace series. 
> 
> Also, towards the end there's like hints towards sex, but it's not really descriptive, because I refuse to write scenes like that.
> 
> Angst is my forte, and always will be.

_"What are you doing?"_

_"What does it look like shuckface? I'm packing."_

_"Packing for what?"_

_Minho sighed, before releasing the backpack gripped in his hands. He looked down for a moment before turning around to face Thomas, who had dark bags under his eyes. His brown hair flew in every direction possible, and his clothes looked messier than usual._

_"He's still out there. I have to go back for him. We shouldn't have left him in that state-"_

_"Minho, if this is Newt you're talking about, forget it."_

_The Asian's body grew tense in under a second, with fire in his eyes and rage in his soul._

_"I don't know if you know this Thomas, but I've known Newt longer than almost anyone here. I'm am going to go back for him, and you can't stop me."_

_Thomas sighed, and his shoulders slumped, as if he just took the weight of the world. His eyes looked more distressed, and there was a very carefully hidden amount of fear in them as well._

_"You won't find him." And there was a hint of despair in his voice, mixed in with a desperate plea. It was obvious he knew something Minho didn't._

_"Says who?" Minho tests, his fists now balled at his sides as he stands up to fully face the brunette._

_Thomas swallowed. Minho could feel the air grow tense, and he didn't like it._

_"Says who, Thomas?" The fact that Minho is yelling hasn't occurred to the man himself, but even if he knew, he wouldn't care. They were talking about Newt, his best friend in the whole messed up hell of a world. The Newt that went to such extreme lengths to get them to where they stood at that moment._

_The Newt that pushed all of his fears and thoughts aside, and focused on the mission to save as many people as possible, even if it meant he couldn't make it to the end with them._

_But Minho has the opportunity to go out and find him. No matter how much force it will take, Minho will make sure that Newt makes it back with him. His last words to him before he left still buzzed in his ear, raced in his thoughts and invaded the most pleasant of dreams._

_By the time Thomas is able to pull himself together again, looking a lot less deterred, Minho is already back at his job of packing and sorting._

_"He's gone, Minho. He's never coming back."_

_Minho is beyond angry at this point. The rage from before has multiplied itself, turned into tiny balls of fury tightly packed in his body, filling every single available space in him._

_But at least Thomas has the decency to look shattered._

_His eyes look broken, lost, and just, gone. They're empty pits, the amber without the shine, veiled in dark clouds that keep emotion away. His body is so stiff that he could have been mistaken for a statue, minus the breathing. However, the steady fall and rise of his chest is faster than usual._

_And looking at Thomas like this just does something to Minho. The tiny balls of rage slowly deteriorate, becoming pockets of so many mixed feelings, that Minho wants to cry and scream, laugh and smile, punch something and sob, hug Thomas and punch himself all at once._

_"How do you know that?"_

_And it's a whisper. He's not even sure Thomas heard him. It was so quiet, his own ears had to strain to hear the words of hope with fear. It's a sure mix of the two, because he doesn't want to be scared. This is the Safe Haven. It's supposed to be their own happy ending. He's supposed to be here with the people he cared for, the people that were always there for him. The hope however, is entirely fake._

_He knows it, and he's sure Thomas does too. Maybe that's why Thomas didn't reply to him right away._

_Of course, it could be almost any reason for Thomas not to share, but Minho isn't quite sure there is another reason._

_The next words that escape Thomas' mouth is so filled with emotion, so filled with pain, that Minho doesn't know what to do with himself. He wants to jump in a hole and bury himself, wants to scream, wants to sob, wants to punch anyone and everyone._

_He wants to tell the world to stop being so unfair to him._

_But he's done that more than once before, and he doubts it'll get any better._

_"Because I killed him."_

_The words are tiny daggers to his blood red heart, and he swears he could feel it bleeding inside his chest. It takes every bone in his body, every tiny bit of courage he has left to open his mouth to reply to the broken brunette standing before him._

_"Why?" Is all he can ask._

_And in all reality, Thomas should have seen that question coming. Minho would want to know how, want to know why he would do it in the first place._

_Thomas can't say anything. The memories are too painful for him, too fresh, and it feels like opening a new wound. Like getting shot in the stomach right after it healed, like ripping off a bandage on an old scar, that opens up because it's become too reliant on the bandage to keep it together._

_A small, painful sob escapes his mouth when he opens it to reply. The swarm of feelings fills his stomach, and his brain can't handle keeping up with it all. It's all too confusing, and all too simple. He had killed Newt. And he would have to live with that for the rest of his life. It's easy to come to terms with the simple statement. He had killed Newt. It was such a simple_ _sentence, tiny and innocent._

_But when the emotions and memories that come with it barge in, that's when everything becomes a hurricane. When too much is spinning, where he is in the middle, the calm of it all, watching everything sort itself out inside his own head._

_It's nauseating to watch, and even worse to feel. He manages to settle the storm down at such a small amount, that it's a struggle to get a single word out of his mouth._

_"I had to."_

_The look on Minho's face tells Thomas that that wasn't the answer he wanted. He wanted it to be something entirely different, like it was an accident._

_Unfortunately, it wasn't._

_Thomas doesn't believe in fate, but he's sure that his life was meant to be this way. It was challenging him, testing the waters of his sanity, poking him to see how much he could take before he burst and left life itself forever._

_He promised he wouldn't. He promised to himself he would never give in to the urges of a knife to his heart, or a gun to his head. Because what does that mean to everyone who had already died? What does it mean to the people that gave their lives up so he and the others could make it this far?_

_Their lives would mean nothing then._

_And he couldn't have that. He couldn't die knowing that not only is their blood on his hands, but that the reason for it in the first place is useless in the end._

_"What do you mean you had to?" Minho asks, the rage returning, the bubbles turning into red fury again._

_"He told me to do it. He- he begged me, Minho."_

_At this point Thomas doesn't care if he looks either pathetic or weak to his friend, because he doesn't know if he'll ever tell anyone else this. But Minho deserves to know the truth more than anyone._

_Thomas's knees buckle, and he's too weak to care about trying to hold himself upright. Trying to calm the hurricane was too much work. It's a painful job, and he carried a lot more weight in the job than anyone ever should._

_Minho kneels before him, very slowly, and caution was clear in his features. His friend is in a very damaging emotional state, and he needs to be careful about every single move he makes. How he breathes, how he speaks, how he carries himself. Anything could trigger Thomas, and he won't lose another friend._

_"He held the- the... the g-"_

_Thomas can't even finish that sentence. Tears are streaming down his face and leaving his eyes to burn. The white becomes red, and his amber eyes no longer have the black clouds blocking the emotion from his eyes._

_More sobs escape his lips, and he tries so hard to press them together. He doesn't care that they might bruise later, because right now he can control so little, he needs to have something to be in charge of, and it has to be communicating with Minho._

_He ignores the struggle to contain his emotions, to keep them all at bay. He tries to calm the storm, the hurricane inside his head so he can clear his thoughts._

_"The gun to his head." Is all Thomas can get out before sobbing again, his body shaking from the amount of effort he puts forth into taming the wild wild seas of his mind._

_Minho tries so hard himself to not cry out when Thomas is able to finish his sentence. He's very careful when he goes to hug him as well, but it's not only to comfort the brunette. Minho knows that the rest of the story only gets worse from there, and Thomas will completely lose it if he sees Minho cry._

_"He looked so broken. So s-scared. I... I did- I didn't-"_

_As an encouraging gesture, Minho just rubs Thomas's back, hands gentle and fingers small whispers against the fabric of his shirt._

_"I didn't want to do it. It was so hard."_

_At the word so, Thomas squeezes Minho tighter, and the other could feel the tears start to stain his shirt. But now is not the time to think about it._

_Minho doesn't know what to say. He himself knows that if he were supposed to shoot Newt, he couldn't bring himself to do it either._

_Newt has been one of the strongest people he's ever known. He was resilient and so kind to everyone, with the right mixture of not dealing with anyone's klunk. He would know what to do no matter what, becoming an amazing problem solver. He was more mentally capable than even himself._

_If he ever had to, he would admit he looked up to Newt. No hesitation. He was brilliant in his own way, and there was just no one he could compare him to._

_"He died hating me, Minho." Thomas cried out, and Minho swore his heart just tore in two. The desperation in the others voice was so raw that it pained him to hear. And the heavy amounts of pain, grief, misery, and sadness mixed in with it all was just too much._

_Minho had to try very hard to keep his voice level. "No, he didn't. He would never hate you Thomas. Not in a million lifetimes."_

_It's at this point Minho wonders if he should tell Thomas. Afterall, if Newt was truly gone, it wouldn't matter if he let the secret slip. There's nothing to really stop him, so what's holding him back from telling the tortured soul?_

_"He hated me. He died hating me. Minho, he-"_

_To hell with the secrets he promised to keep. Right here, right now, Thomas was sobbing in his arms, grieving over the loss of his best friend. A true companion. And it seemed like he shouldn't be this affected by it all this much unless there was a deeper meaning to their friendship._

_"He never hated you, Thomas. Because he loved you. He loved you so much, that he could never hate you. It will never be possible, no matter what you do."_

_Thomas stiffened in his arms, and his sobs almost immediately stopped. His body was still shaking violently, so fast that he could probably run a 20k without thinking._

_"What did you just-"_

_"He loved you Thomas. He told me himself. I'm not lying."_

_It starts out with a simple giggle. And then it turns into a full bellied laugh. Joy fills Thomas's lungs, and his heart starts to glow in a way he never thought it would._

_Because Newt loved him._

_He loved him back._

_Of course the happiness doesn't last, but for a few moments, Thomas completely forgets that Newt is dead, that the reason he's hugging Minho so tightly is because he was mourning over the love of his life's death._

_It may have only lasted seconds, but it's enough to let Thomas take control of the storm swarming his mind. The waters become still, and the whirlwind of overwhelming emotions just freezes in place. A new strength is found in the brunette, and the world is suddenly lifted from his shoulders._

_But all things must come to an end._

_The laugh turns into a sad sigh mixed into the joy, and that's enough to remind him of everything. The hurricane in his mind starts spinning as soon as it escapes his mouth, which leaves him drenched. He now holds the weight of the world on his chest, and it feels heavier than usual. Because now it's a dead weight pulling him down._

_The realization hits him smack dab in the face, and a tidal wave crashes into his body, resoaking him in the immense amount of emotions._

_"I killed him."_

_And he's not wrong._

_"I killed the love of my life."_

_He's not wrong there either._

_"I never got to tell him." And the truth hurts more than it probably should. But this is Thomas. The world hates him, and will do anything to bring him down._

_And this,_

_This might just work._

_Because he's now realized he's killed the love of his life, and it's just too much for him to process. The hurricane in his head has doubled in size now, drenching him over and over and over again. Water droplets sink into his skin, and the cold spots of water is the only thing keeping him awake._

_"I never got to tell him how I feel. I'm too late. I'll never get to see him again. He won't ever know. He died not knowing I loved him back. I loved him and he never knew. I was so stupid. Why didn't I tell him. We could've- could've-"_

_"Thomas. Thomas, stay with me." Minho shakes his shoulders now, smacking his face firm, but gently enough so he doesn't break anything._

_Thomas' voice is becoming fainter by the second, and the water droplets are no longer keeping him awake, because now he's used to the cold. The water doesn't affect him anymore, and he's swimming in cold dark water._

_Everything is black to him. He can no longer see a light to swim back to. Everything surrounding him is cold and dark, and he just hates it._

_He would scream, but the water has overtaken his lungs, though it doesn't feel like he's drowning. The liquid is thick, but also comforting, and he feels like he can breathe it in. He's not sure if he's actually supposed to, but he doesn't really care._

_Distantly, he can hear someone screaming something, and can faintly feel his body being moved around, but it's barely there, and soon he just feels like a bubble in the water, just floating around, not doing much but existing._

_All the memories that surround him are too much, and before he knows it it feels like his brain just shuts down on itself._

* * *

He feels like he's floating on clouds, in midair, as he kisses Newt.

Hands are roaming all over his body, mapping out every curve of his skin, tracing the surface with cold and gentle palms and calloused fingers.

Tiny sounds are escaping both of their mouths, but neither of them can bring themselves to care. To anyone else, they could be described as disgusting sounds, but it's only the two of them.

They're wrapped up in each other physically, and maybe mentally too. Shirts are taken off and the duo fall onto the medical bed in the hut. Worries are thrown out the small window in the wooden hut, and breaths hitch as they tease one another.

Newt starts it, playing with the hem of Thomas' pants, and then Thomas picks up by running a leg against his thigh. The blonde does not appreciate the teasing, and all too soon have they collapsed onto the bed, too tired to do anything but hold each other under the thin blue sheet Thomas had thrown over them. 

It's pure bliss to the two of them, as they lay next to one another, their fingers fiddling with one another's. It was dark outside, and the only light they had was from a small candle in the corner of the hut on the opposite side of the bed, along with the natural lighting of the moon. 

Thomas thought he could get used to this, sleeping next to Newt every night, relaxed and not worrying about their lives being placed in danger. He never wanted this to end.

And he knows he has to do it now. He has to tell Newt how he feels, because he doesn't think there will ever be another time to do so.

As Thomas shifts his body, so that he's completely facing the love of his life, Newt looks over at him curiously. His deep brown eyes glint with curiosity, and Thomas feels the urge to brush a few blonde strands away from his long eyelashes.

"I love you."

It's simple, not complicated, and he hopes that Newt loves him back, that Minho was right for once.

A small smile curls itself onto Newt's face, and Thomas wants to smack him for having perfected the right amount of smug and fodness into one look.

"I love you too."

**Author's Note:**

> Ahhhhhh please don't kill me. I tried.


End file.
